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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Aug 30, 2009 18:11:21 GMT -8
Oh, mmmmm. Yum. Tasty in the tummy.
Not!
That was a lie! A big, fat, filthy lie that adults told to taunt younger folks. Nasty grown-ups, nasty, nasty. What was the lie, you might ask? Well, the whole universe was a lie, but that left aside, well, pubs were. In particular, the items they sold there. Well, not the food, that was good. The drinks. The drinks were bad. They were foul. They were disgusting. They were, Jenny had been told, an acquired taste.
Faugh! Whiskey! Who needed it! Jenny didn’t! All she needed was her own two fists and the dirk in her sock. And maybe a fancy word or two. And a fast pair of legs. Those were important, she mustn’t forget. Swift legs were crucial tools. Tools. Tools….Tshools….
“Dad-blum-blastit!” She muttered as she looked down at her short legs, and pathetic legs, at that. “Tshools, shmools! My blarney arse, that’ssh what!” Her eyes lost focus for a moment, and the young red-head had to spent a few moments blinking in rapid succession to clear the fuzzy-wuzzies.
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[ooc] posted, meh first drunk post! XD suckage
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Aug 31, 2009 8:55:46 GMT -8
Thump, thump, thump!
The sound was being made by a blonde-haired woman sitting not far from the girl, and she was making the sound by hitting her head off of the table repeatedly. Ceara was wearing her usual clothes, trousers with a tunic, and, of course, her sword strapped to her belt. That was crucial. She always had to have her sword with her.
Ceara stopped bashing her head against the table and looked up, rubbing her forehead absent mindedly. She looked...well, drunk. Her blonde hair was messy and she looked a little dopey, though her green eyes were bright, like right after really good sex. She had a small grin on her face and she didn't seem to notice that she'd just been hitting her head off the table, though of course she'd done it on purpose. In her hand she held a half empty bottle of whiskey...or maybe it was some other alcoholic drink, she'd stopped caring after the first bottle.
She stared at the girl who was muttering to herself for a moment, lazy grin still in place before it suddenly disappeared and she glared at the girl instead. "Oi, girl, shuddap!" She snapped at her. She paused for a moment, still watching her. Her gaze suddenly softened and she sighed, taking another swig of her drink. "I remember when I was your age...no fears of marriage, no pressure to find a husband. Gawd!" She yelled out the last word, though her words were slightly slurred from the alcohol. She turned and hit her head off the table once again, though she didn't pull back this time, just rested her forehead against the table and stared at the wood a centimeter from her face. If you hadn't noticed, Ceara was a very moody drunk.
((Told ya I suck at drunk people, especially when they talk. JUST IMAGINE HER WORDS ARE SLURRED! xD))
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Aug 31, 2009 9:09:01 GMT -8
"Oi? OI? OI!? OI! Ye shut yer trap, that's what! Bairns 'n' men's last thin' on m'mind a'th' mom'. Quit yer yarpin', ye auld besom!" the fifteen summers old lass bellowed, somewhere in the general direction of whoever it was that had howled at her. She had to squint to get any sort of semi-decent visual of the person, and what she got was a vague, blurry view of some filthy blonde.
"OI! I'm ta'king t'ye! Lookit up, now!" Jenny added with a waving of arms abouve her head when it finally got through to her head that the person was somewhat laying down on the table. Well, that just wasn't polite - she was talking to her, and the lady wasna even lookin'. For some reason, it was starting to seriously piss the red-head off.
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[ooc] lawl - I can pretend; just try an' mince yer words, make them look like they sound phonetically. And sorry, I just found out that Jenny's a mean drunk....
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Aug 31, 2009 9:20:09 GMT -8
It took Ceara a moment to realize that the girl was yelling at her. Slowly she lifted her head, staring through blurry eyes at the redhead as she was ordered to do so. She just stared at the girl until she finished talking, and then tears came to her eyes and she sniffed. "Y-You dun haveta bee so meaaaan!" She wailed, covering her face with her hands and sobbing into them. She couldn't really remember what the girl had said exactly, but the tone of voice she'd spoken to her with had been mean, and had hurt Ceara's feelings.
She would cry for a few minutes before suddenly stopping and looking up, a mischievous grin on her face. She got to her feet, took a step away from the girl and unsheathed her sword, lifting it over her head with one hand and swinging it around wildly. "You migh' wanna be nice-er to me, 'cause I've'a gotta s'word!" She told the girl, nodding her head proudly as she continued to wave her sword around wildly over her head.
((I think you might be overdoing it a bit, I barely understood what she said! xD))
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Aug 31, 2009 9:40:47 GMT -8
The sword was a big'un, rather like a certain sword that Jenny might or might not have "borrowed" a while back in her childhood, which had resulted in a nice, long scar in which to add to her already numerous 'scar collection'.
"Ye dinna scar' mun!" she growled as she bent over and fumbled for the dirk in her sock. She would have gone for the sgian dhu, her bonny black blade, but that was precious, and a last minute resort. "Ha! See yon, ye pawky wae callan! Nane o' thi' hurry burry, noo!"
And to help bring her meaning down home, she growled threateningly and slashed the air with her dirk a couple of time. The dirk, she was pleased to see, had stayed in her hand. Well, wait, of course it did. Silly her.
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[ooc] means I'm doing a half-decent job; meshing Scottish brogue and drunken slurr should make it tough to understand. "tis a whole 'nother language, aye?
mun - me
dinna - didn't
yon - yonder
pawky - cunning, sly
wae - sorry
callan - boy (gender confusion!)
nane - none
hurry burry - carry on, fuss
noo - now
also, I'm surprised that they haven't been tossed out of whatever establishment they're in....XD; aaaaand I just thought I'd mention it, but JENNY'S A BIG FAT HYPOCRITE!
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Aug 31, 2009 13:35:14 GMT -8
Ceara blinked a few times at the girl's words, looking a little confused as she replayed the girl's words over in her head. Not even then did she completely understand what the girl was saying, but she could sort of guess. The girl's tone implied that she was being insulted... and that was about all that she could figure out, besides the girl's first words, which had been something along the lines of 'You don't scare me'. Ceara gave the girl a hard glare, lowering her sword to her side before tilting her head backwards to look at the ceiling and screaming. "MAKE SENSE WHEN YOU TAWK!"
The girl was getting on her nerves, even if she wasn't quite sure about everything the girl was saying. She noticed the girl take out a dirk, and frowned for a moment, wondering whether this meant the girl was good at fighting. After a moment she dismissed that thought, deciding in her drunken stupor that no one could fight as well as she could, especially not with such a puny weapon compared to her sword. Now, it might not be the biggest sword she'd ever seen...it was no where near as big as that giant-ass sword she'd seen a boy wielding, but she was pretty darn proud of her sword. It was hers, after all, and it had her initials carved into the blade.
She leaped backwards as the girl swung at the air a few times, unable to see through her blurry eyes that the blade wouldn't have hit her. She crashed into a table and nearly tumbled to the ground, but she managed to catch herself. For some reason, this sent her into a vicious fit of giggles and she doubled over slightly, clutching at her gut with the hand that wasn't currently holding her sword. When she'd recovered enough, she grinned at the girl. "Oi, not bad! But t'is nawt good enough, neither! MUAHAHAHAHA!" She felt compelled to try laugh evilly at the end, though she wasn't sure why. This just sent her into another fit of giggles.
Finally, when she'd recovered from this, she lunged towards Jenny, thrusting her dagger towards the girl's gut, squinting her eyes to try judge where the girl actually was.
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Aug 31, 2009 13:54:59 GMT -8
"S'na, issa? Nuff o' tha lip, noo!" She cried as she stumbled toward the other drunkard, trying to dodge the blade that was sent her way. Well, it might have been sent her way, she wasn't sure yet. Wait, drunk? She wasna fou, no sirree! Her auld faither allas quo, if'n shay cou' taich ha'ir bum, shay wasna fou.
In an almost frantic frenzy, driven by some irrational urge to prove herself wrong (oh, boy) Jenny tucked her precious dirk into her elbow (luckily, she only stabbed herself twice) and then moved her clumsy hands to her rear end. It took some searching around, but eventually, Jenny found her bum. Relief settled into her as her fingers started probing their body's buttocks. "Nane sae fou, a'er a'!" She crowed triumphantly.
And then she started to totter. The ground started to play games, and she lost her depth perception, and, well, she and the piss-covered floor all of the sudden became very well acquainted. Rather disgustingly and uncommonly so.
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[ooc] darn that floor!
s'na - it's not
issa - is it
nuff - (e)nough
lip - cheekiness
fou - drunk
auld - old
faither - father
allas - always
quo - said
shay - she
taich - touch
ha'ir - her
wasna - wasn't
nane - none
sae - so
a'er - after
a' - all
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Aug 31, 2009 15:05:57 GMT -8
Ceara stared at the girl, and then broke into another fit of giggles as Jenny tucked away her dirk. "Givin' up, are ya!?" She shouted triumphantly. At her own words, however, she frowned, as though she couldn't understand what she'd said. "Why do thay say 'givin' up'? Wha are ya...givin' up?" She asked aloud, slowly looking up towards the ceiling, as though preparing to give something to it. She shook her head and looked back at Jenny, squinting to see what the girl was doing. She giggled some more as she realized the girl was touching her own but, laughing obnoxiously.
She let go of her sword, letting it drop to the ground and moved her own hands to her butt, feeling it and giggling madly all the while. She had no idea why the girl was touching her own butt, nor why she'd felt the need to copy her...she just had. "Hmmmm....Squishey." She said to herself, nodding her head before taking her hands away from her butt, deciding there was nothing interesting there. She laughed for no reason and sat down....but there was no chair or anything there to catch her, and she fell on ass. She blinked in surprise. "Oh gawd....are youu a'right?" She asked, as though not realized that she was the one that had fallen down. It was at that moment that Jenny herself fell, and Ceara just stared at her for a few moments, taking that time to understand what had happened.
She crawled towards the girl and stopped before her, leaving her sword where it had fallen behind her. ".....Are ya dead?" She asked, her voice oddly cheerful and curious. "Er...died? Nonononono....die...ing?" She asked, reaching out and poking the girl's head with her finger, hesitantly, as though afraid the girl would suddenly come back to life. She couldn't help but glance at the girl's butt, wondering what was so interesting about it. "Hmm. Nothin' speciial thar." She muttered, before turning her attention back to Jenny's head.
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Aug 31, 2009 17:53:09 GMT -8
"I'm na dy'n," Jen muttered, her lips moving over the stank and filth of the cold stone floor. Her dirk had spilled away from her, and was currently resting just inches from it's owner's head.
"Jist...restin' m'fee'," she added sleepily. She tried to move one of her arms, and when a sharp jab of pain bit down deep into her muscles and demanded no movement, Jenny was more than happy to comply. Instead, she moved the other arm. "Na' fou," she slurred as she reached back behind her again and patted her rump. "Taiching me arse, aye?"
Suddenly, she noticed that something was near her. Nearish. Somewhat. Ish. "An, wha'bou' ye?" she asked,"Taich yer bum?" She strained to see the other's arse.
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[ooc] well, um, wow.
And Ceara might not think her bum's anything special, but I'm pretty sure Seth and Rollo would have something different to say to that *lecherous grin*
No glossary - this should be pretty straight-forward;
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Aug 31, 2009 18:19:54 GMT -8
Ceara looked a little disappointed for a moment as Jenny told her that she wasn't dying, and was tempted to say that that was a shame. She'd never seen someone die this close up and personal, had she? She thought for a moment, and suddenly remembered quite a few times when she actually had. She laughed at her own stupidity and shook her head. Watching someone die close up wasn't that great, especially if it wasn't even interesting enough for her to remember it. Sure, she might be a litttlleeee drunk at the moment, but she figured she'd remember something like watching someone die quicker if it had been interesting.
She shrugged, her smile returning to her face. "Ah, tha's gooooooooddd." She said, nodding her head at her own words and giggling slightly. "Mmm....me too." She said as the girl said that she was just resting her feet, and she moved to lie down beside Jenny on the garbage-covered floor, staring at the ceiling in fascination, as though she could see through it to the night sky above. She seemed to have forgotten that just a few moments ago she and Jenny were about to fight.
She turned to look at Jenny as she touched her butt, breaking out in another fit of giggles at the sight. "Yo're wee-er-d." She said, sounding out the word 'weird' as though it was hard for her to pronounce. She hadn't understood why Jenny was touching her ass, but that didn't matter. When the girl asked if she could touch her own butt, she rolled onto her side, so that her back was to the girl and felt around her lower back with her hand until it came to rest on her ass. "Mmmhmm!" She said cheerfully, rolling back onto her back and grinning at Jenny. She didn't seem to realize that they were lying on the floor of a dirty-ass bar with a few people staring at them.
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Aug 31, 2009 18:32:00 GMT -8
Jenny beamed when the lad....lass touched her bottom. The neither of them were fou, and that was good. "Na' fou, youse twa," she said happily. It was nice to just lay on the floor with another person. Just be peaceful, and happy, and content.
And bleeding. Not that Jenny was aware of that fact at the moment, just that she was. The other lass flipped over, and Jenny squinted at her again. "Guid Sooth," she exclaimed suddenly. And then she giggled, laughing at the way the words sounded and how they came out of her mouth. "Guid Sooth, guid sooth, gu-iiiiid soooooooth," she repeated, playing with the vovels and places of emphasis. And then she giggled again, her nose touching the cold floor. Not that she cared.
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[ooc] ah, giggles are contagious!
youse - you (plural)
twa - too
guid sooth - just an exclamation
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Sept 1, 2009 14:38:13 GMT -8
Ceara grinned at the girl, though she still had absolutely no idea what the girl was saying. "Yus, gouuddd soup. Goooouuuddd soup. Yo're so amusin', mah for-heign fwiend." She said, giggling madly. She was totally content at the moment, just laying there, looking at all the amusing patterns that were on the ceiling, though of course she could have just been imagining things. She couldn't rely on her eyes at the moment, as she could barely see out of them.
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Sept 1, 2009 15:11:52 GMT -8
Jenny giggled, and then squirmed. Her clothes were suddenly too tight, and she rather felt like something was amiss. And then she felt a slow, hot puddle form somewhere south of her head. The inn had a hot spring, whaddya know! Jenny giggled again as she got a sudden image of herself in a ball gown diving head first into a steaming hot pool of water. Only, she was doing it backwards. And it wasn't really diving, it was sort of a flop into the water. And the sad thing was, Jenny couldn't swim, 'least not very well.
The lass frowned as her image was ruined by invasive images, and suddenly, she was all pissed off again. "Bugger!" she muttered, and then, as suddenly as she grew angry, she was giddy again. With a broad smile, she started to sing in a really loud and obnoxious manner, "Bonnie braw kye, 'wh'en th' kye coome hame! wh'en th' kye coome hame'...!" and then she trailed off, forgetting what came next in the song.
"Wh'a's ne'?" she slurred attrociously as she turned her head fractionally to look at the person next to her, inquiring of her companion the lyrics that followed.
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[ooc] >_> I just did the first thing that came to mind... just so you know, it's your fault, what and with all that "goooood sooooooup" business
bugger - fu.ck
bonnie - beautiful
braw - fine
kye - cattle
th' - the
hame - home
ne' - next
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Post by Ceara Mindelan on Sept 2, 2009 15:02:01 GMT -8
Ceara turned to stare at the girl, a frown coming to her face as she guessed what the girl was saying. What was next? Heck, what song was she even singing? Wait...had she been singing at all? Maybe Ceara had actually been the one singing. It had sounded like her voice, hadn't it? She thought so, and as soon as she realized she'd stopped singing she begun to panic, thinking everyone around her was waiting expectantly to hear her beautiful voice again. She couldn't disappoint her fans, could she!?
Now, what song had she been singing again? She couldn't remember. But knowing any loyal fan wouldn't care, so long as they got to hear her magnificent voice again, she just opened her mouth and began singing the first thing that came to mind. "Uhhh.... TWINKLE, TWINKLE, LIL STAR, HOW I---" She paused, taking a deep intake of breath, as she'd suddenly found herself out of breath. She must have forgotten to breathe while singing. "WONDER WHA' YOU ARE. UP ABOVE A WORL' SO----" Again, she paused to take a huge intake of breath. "BRIGH', LIKE A DIAMOND IN THE SKY, TWINKLE, TWINKLE---" On last pause for breath. "LIL STAR, HOW I WONDER WHA' YOU ARE!" This whole song she'd been bellowing at the top of her lungs, and she really had an awful singing voice. In her own ears, however, it sounded amazing. "Thank youse, thank youse," She said, envisioning a crowd of people clapping for her. She would have bowed...was she not already lying on the ground, and had she thought she'd be able to do so without falling on her face in her drunken stupor.
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Post by ``Jennifer MacKenzie on Sept 2, 2009 17:57:56 GMT -8
"A braw dittay!" Jenny exclaimed as soon as the other singer had finished. It wasn't actually the other part of the song that the red-head had been initially singing, but it was wonderful, all the same.
She managed to drag her away from her side and in front of her, and a round of applause went out, delivered by yours truly. Who cared if she was only one of two people clapping - she allas though that she should act how she wished.
"Unsse moure?" she asked, hoping that the star would deliver yet another enchanting performance. Or at least say something funny.
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[ooc] hah - 101 words! and the words should be easy to understand/previously glossarified.
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